You've arrived, unpacked and begun to settle in. Perhaps many of your arrangements
have been made—schools have been selected for your kids, your new house
or apartment is set up—but that doesn't quite make it home...yet.
How long that takes depends on your circumstances. Do you have relatives in
the area, a company "work family," or memories of time spent nearby
as a child? These factors lend a comforting sense of familiarity, even if you've
just arrived. Or perhaps you feel like I did arriving in San Francisco, 8 years
ago, with a job lead and two college friends in the city. I must admit it's
taken me years, but I can now say that I feel at home.
Home, as you know, is about people as much as anything, and relationships
with friends, neighbors, teachers and grocery store owners.
Relocating is stressful, and part of that has less to do with the boxes and
arrangement than the new relationships you'll need to make...and, well...that
feeling of "home" that only time can deliver. So be patient, but
be active!
Is there a way to fertilize the soil a bit and get those taproots growing?
Consider these tips:
- Push yourself slightly beyond your basic comfort level. Coach yourself
each week to do something you wouldn't naturally do. This may be as
simple as deciding
to walk your dog every morning in a park crowded with pet owners instead of
along lonely streets.
- Community service and volunteerism may be one of the
best ways to create meaningful new ties. Find opportunities through
local community centers or gardens, your
job, churches, or schools, or online.
- Join a club! Salsa dancing, rock climbing,
chess? You name it! Try to find affinity groups in your area. Immediately
resume one or two activities you did before
moving. You'll meet people with common interests right off the bat!
- Find a common-interest support network. If you have kids, look for
a "young
families" group. A health condition? Try a local hospital for weekly support
groups. Religious or faith traditions? Start looking for a new church and find
your community now.
- Call someone new. If you have a friend who knows someone in your
new town, call them. Take them to coffee and ask them to tell you about
the place.
- Buy a map and start exploring. Or just get on a bus and let yourself
be driven around. Seeing your new place is fun and right away gives
you something in
common with other people. And you'll start developing your favorite haunts—a
true sign of home!
- This is a great time to start something totally new. Always wanted
to take a cooking class? Go for it! Take advantage of the new adventures
and possibilities.
You'll meet friends with common interests along the way.
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Here's a final note on relocating from Barb Ratcliffe, a senior certified
relocation professional: "The psychological aspects are often underestimated...In
my years in the industry I've had the opportunity to work with lots and lots
of transferring families. And I don't think people allow themselves the slack
to deal with the emotions. Mostly what people need to do is acknowledge what
they're going through to themselves."